After a few months of becoming part of estate life, the feeling of loneliness slowly began to creep in.
I was far from my family and hometown, surrounded by thousands of hectares of oil palm, in an estate located about 90 kilometres from the nearest town. The area was so remote that even reaching the estate required passing through four main gates belonging to different estates.
The people there simply called it the "Kem". Ie Camp.
To enter the Kem meant entering the plantation or palm oil mill. And being “orang Kem” meant being part of the estate community.
There were no shopping malls, cafés, cinemas, or busy town centers to escape to.
There were only the people of the estate and mill, going about their daily work and responsibilities.
So, if I wanted to overcome the loneliness, I had to learn one important thing:
I had to socialize.
I started joining whatever activities were happening around the estate.
There were football tournaments, club activities that brought together people from different estates and mills, festive celebrations, Merdeka Day gatherings, and various community events throughout the year.
Occasionally, estate workers would invite us to their weddings, aqiqah ceremonies, or birthday gatherings for their children.
These invitations were more than social occasions.
They were opportunities to build relationships.
Then came 2005, when Akademi Fantasia became a nationwide phenomenon.
Every weekend, it became the most anticipated event in the Kem.
It was almost like a weekly premiere.
A screen would be set up around the residential area, families would gather, and everyone would contribute food for a potluck barbecue. People cooked, ate, laughed, and watched the singing competition together.
After spending the entire day working at the mill, seeing everyone gathered together and enjoying themselves was incredibly satisfying.
There were also annual events, such as thanksgiving dinners held after the mill's annual inspection and machinery checks.
Staff and their families would put on performances, while estate managers and their teams were often invited to join the celebration.
During the day, everyone was focused on their respective duties.
But at night, we became one community.
We ate together.
We laughed together.
We celebrated together.
And somehow, all those simple activities made the loneliness and isolation of living in a remote place disappear.
Over the years, these routines followed me wherever I went.
From one estate to another.
From one company to another.
From one state to another.
It became almost an unwritten rule: if there was an invitation, I should be there.
And as a manager, I eventually realized that social connections were not merely about having fun.
They helped us understand people.
They built trust.
And ultimately, they helped us perform our work more effectively.
In 2015, I moved from upstream to downstream, leaving estate life in Lahad Datu.
There were many reasons behind the move, but one unexpected consequence was that I began to miss the lively social life of the estate.
I tried to adapt to my new life in town.
I joined social, welfare, and recreational activities organized by individuals and various groups.
Whenever there was no school activity involving my children on the weekend, we would often go camping around some of our favorite locations in Lahad Datu.
Later, while in Sandakan, I became active in Toastmasters, participating in both English- and Malay-speaking clubs.
Through Toastmasters, I met many new friends from industries far beyond the palm oil sector.
Looking back, two decades in Borneo have taken me to countless places and introduced me to countless people.
Every move brought new faces.
Every place brought new experiences.
And every friendship left behind another memory.
1,001 memories that I still miss today.
After spending several months in Sumatra, I have once again found myself in a new environment.
A different place.
A different culture.
A different community.
But the lesson remains the same.
Even in a foreign land, I have already made a few friends to meet for a drink on the weekend.
Perhaps this is one of the most important lessons I have learned from living and working in remote places:
When you are far from home, you cannot survive on your own for very long.
You need people.
You need friendship.
You need community.
And sometimes, the simplest invitation to sit down, have a meal, watch a television series, drink a cup of coffee, or simply talk can make an unfamiliar place feel a little more like home.
After all, wherever we go, it is the people we meet that turn a place into a home.
That is my story for today.
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