During my first three months working at a palm oil mill, I had an accident that injured one of my fingers on my right hand. The injury was quite serious, as it involved the bone.
It happened in my third month after arriving in Lahad Datu. At that time, I had no relatives or close friends in the area. After all, it was my first time setting foot in Sabah, back in 2004. The only people I knew were my colleagues at the palm oil mill, whom I had only known for a few months.
On my first day in the hospital, the feeling of loneliness began to overwhelm me. I deliberately kept the incident from my parents back in my hometown because I did not want them to worry. After all, I considered it a minor injury involving just one finger on my right hand. I was still single and had not yet married. The only person who knew about my condition was my girlfriend, who was living far away in Kuala Lumpur.
The days I spent at Lahad Datu Hospital were quite miserable. Not so much because of the pain, but because of the boredom and loneliness. During my five-day stay, I practically explored every corner of the hospital just to keep myself occupied.
On the fifth day, I finally received my first visitor. It was someone I knew from a supplier company that provided equipment to the mill. Perhaps they had heard about my hospitalisation from my colleagues at the mill.
I truly appreciated that brief visit. At the same time, I never blamed my other colleagues for not coming. I understood that they had their own responsibilities to attend to, and the considerable distance between the mill and the town made visiting me rather difficult.
On the sixth day, I was discharged and returned to the palm oil mill. I was given two weeks of medical leave. However, after spending just a few days confined at home, I decided to return to the office and resume work.
I simply could not bear staying at home doing nothing, especially after nearly a week of boredom in Lahad Datu Hospital. Being in an unfamiliar place, with nobody close to talk to or visit, was mentally exhausting.
In 2021, almost 17 years after my first hospitalisation at Lahad Datu Hospital, I found myself admitted to the same hospital once again. This time, it was due to a minor slipped disc.
Although I now had a family and children, the situation was different because Malaysia was under the Movement Control Order (MCO 2.0). My family was not allowed to visit me in the hospital.
For three consecutive days, I was confined to my hospital bed, unable to move my body properly. All I could do was lie there and stare at the ceiling of the hospital room. Once again, I had to go through the experience of being alone in a hospital, without anyone by my side.
Today, I visited a friend who had been admitted to the hospital due to a health problem. His family lived far away, and he too had nobody beside him during his hospital stay.
I started our conversation by asking about his health and how he was feeling. Then, I shared with him my two experiences of being hospitalised alone, without anyone coming to visit me.
I told him how those experiences had affected me mentally and how deeply they had made me feel the weight of loneliness.
I sincerely hoped he would not have to go through the same feelings. I encouraged him to stay in touch with his family back home, keep communicating with them, and remain positive throughout his recovery.
Eventually, he smiled.
He told me that he had not smiled for several days because of his illness, but today, I had managed to make him smile.
That simple remark meant a lot to me.
Perhaps I could not do much to ease his physical pain, but at least I had managed to bring a little happiness into his hospital room.
That is my story today.
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